5 Simple Things I Stopped Doing To Be Happier
Happiness is not permanent. Let’s start with that. Just like everything else, emotions have an ebb and flow. However, to be able to tap into moments of joy easier, and to move through the lows with more grace - these are 5 things I keep in mind that have been life-changing.
Log Off. You do not need to be online 24/7 and you honestly shouldn’t be. Whether you have a business or not. Social media, emails, calendar appointments, forums, etc. Is constant noise and distraction. It’s like opening up a new tab every time you read or consume something new. Next thing you know you have 500 tabs open mentally, and your brain is exhausted.
Rush In The Morning. This is nothing worse than having your alarm go off, and for the next 30-60 minutes you’re in a full sprint to get out the door. SO DON’T. I know you may be tired, and sleep is amazing (coming from someone who used to be able to sleep an easy 12 hours a night) but you are not doing yourself justice by waiting to wake up until the last minute. Ease into earlier mornings gradually. And this doesn’t mean “my 4am CEO routine”. It simply means allotting an amount of time that lets you ease into your day while accomplishing the things you need to in order to set yourself up for success. That means if you need to wake kids up and get them ready? Schedule enough time in, including if they are slow-moving, aka buffer time. Feel your best with a morning stretch or workout? Schedule in the time. Reading or meditating? Schedule in the time. You get the idea.
No more saying ‘yes’ when it’s actually a ‘no’. This is a hard one for me, and for a lot of people I have talked to. Every time we say yes, or even passively don’t say no - we are allowing our time and energy to be drained from us. What we allow into our world is a reflection of how solid our boundaries are. And by saying yes when we mean no, we are saying it is ok for people to overstep and over ask of us. And that is the fastest way to build resentment and exhaustion. Stop saying yes when you mean no.
Feeling bad for advocating for yourself. This doesn’t mean you are only thinking of yourself 24/7, but it means you unapologetically advocate for yourself and ask for what you need when you need it. Not feeling well and need a rest and have the support to do so? Do it. Need an extension on a work deadline because something sudden came up? Communicate it. Need someone to respect your boundaries better? Tell them. Need to schedule in 30 minutes of me time a day? Make it happen. We are so socialized to feel “selfish” for asking for what we need, but simply, if we don’t we will burn out and not be able to do anything in the long run.
No more perfectionism. Ok ok, this is a BIG one, and it is very hard for many people - but working on this can single-handedly change how you perceive your life. Make mistakes. Get messy. It is truly the only way we learn to adapt, overcome, and handle change. And it really means nothing about you. Everything in life is neutral, the only meanings that come from events or situations are the ones we give to them. Baby step into this practice every day and I promise you the impact will be immense.
Ok, so now you have the 5 things I’ve stopped doing in order to sustain happier days and move through rougher ones. But I want to remind you, intentional living and mindfulness are practices, they take time, they take effort, and they won’t change overnight. I still have days where I feel guilty for sharing what I need or saying yes when I really mean no. But every time I take the opportunity to tap into what is actually good for me, I am one step closer to living with more ease, more space, and more joy. And to me? I’d say that’s worth it.